Dear Reader,
Today I took a lesson from Eminem and cleaned out my closet. It wasn't just a spur of the moment thing and it wasn't because my mom told me to (well it kind of was), but it was also for the purpose of donations (so that counts as part of my project, right?). As Kit has mentioned in one of her posts, our project is mostly done, which means I've been trying to use these last few days to fill in space. I've met with other fellow senior project people who are struggling to get stuff done, meanwhile I'm kind of struggling to find things to do. I've taken to cleaning out my closet, my mom's closet, even my brother's closet (he's insanely tiny so I wouldn't be surprised if most of the girls could fit his clothes) to use as donations to A Broader View and the women's shelter we worked at. Petra, on numerous occasions, told us that our work didn't have to stop the moment we left Guatemala, that we could do more and that's what I've decided to do. I needed to clean out my closet anyway, on account of going to college in a few months. I was originally planning to donate to the Salvation Army, but now I'll just donate to both. I'm sure I have plenty of clothes that I almost never wear that the girls and anyone else would be very grateful to have.
So that's what I did...for three hours. I kid you not it took me three long hours to clean out, sort, and distribute my clothes into 3 separate trash bags. Over the next few days I plan to also ask my friends about cleaning out their own closets so that I can get even more clothes to donate. I only wish I'd started this sooner so that I could get a school-wide drive for clothes, but unfortunately with it being the end of the year, it's very unlikely that I'll be able to do that. Instead I'm sticking to family and friends, knowing that I can get just as great results from that.
I've also taken to doing further research on things that interested me in Guatemala and/or things we didn't get as in depth a look at. In a few posts I talked about Indigenous Cultures or more correctly how fleeting it was while I was there in Guatemala. My exposure to Indigenous cultures came solely from the sellers I met at the market and on the streets as well as the people Kit and I saw on our two excursions (the volcano, Santa Maria and Fuentes Georginas). That's not much to go off of and after talking to Jaime on my last day about his family (which is indigenous people) and his desire to be a lawyer in order to protect their rights, my curiosity got the best of me. I wanted to learn more, not only about the rights of indigenous people in Guatemala, but their way of life, their beliefs and more. Since, as I've noted before, there are many sub-groups of Mayan culture, I stuck strictly to K'iche speakers (this is also what Jaime's family is), which is the largest Mayan language in Guatemala and is used almost exclusively in the highlands (cities like Quetzaltenango would be an example of a highland city). I actually learned a lot. Here are some of the really interesting things that I learned:
-K'iche people constitute 11% of the Guatemalan population.
- The population of Quetzaltenanago is 26% K'iche people
- K'iche was originally an independent state that continued to live on even after the fall of Mayan civilization
-K'iche civilization continued on until it was conquered by Pedro de Alvarado
-There is a document called the Popol Vuh that is still in existence today and it talks about K'iche stories and religion
I think today was a successful day both personally (I mean I did clean out my closet) and academically. I learned a lot about the K'iche indigenous culture and I'm excited to be able to share this information during my defense in the coming week.
Sincerely,
Journey
Friday, April 29, 2016
Day 18: Where are the pictures? Did you even go?
Dear Reader,
Today I got back to normal or at least the normal that I had before I went to Guatemala. The disillusionment has warn off and I'm ready to go back to work as it was before I left. I started looking through pictures today of what we can and can't use in our final presentation. Turns out we didn't take that many pictures at all. We have some pictures from excursions and the ones that A Broader View took, but otherwise there aren't that many to go off of. In fact one could say, "Where are the pictures? Did you even go?" and be completely justified, but I'm justified too in saying that we had a very good reason.
Safety was a large concern in Guatemala and we were often advised not to take out our phones or any expensive looking cameras while out on the streets for fear of being robbed. Being tourists and clearly not from Guatemala made Kit and I targets, something I desperately wanted to avoid. This unfortunately reduced our photography, but I hope that won't make our project look bad. A picture may be worth a thousand words, but Kit and I definitely have more than a thousand words to explain about this experience both good and bad. Also we each had to do an exit video for A Broader View where we explained our project (with A Broader View not our Lovett one), what it meant to us, what we learned and gave a general overview of our entire experience. Later in the week I'm going to edit and piece together Kit and I's respective videos and add in some pictures to use possibly in our presentation for the board and/or for the presentation in front of the school.
Besides presentation work I also did some more Spanish studying today. I'm still working on Past Tense, specifically the preterite. Honestly when teaching yourself a language it's hard to know how fast to pace yourself. In my french class we worked on Passe compose for maybe two weeks, but it seems odd to think I could be working on the preterite for two weeks when it seems to be a concept that I'm (or at least I think I am) grasping pretty well. I think my previous escapades in language (most notably french) has really been helping with my understanding of Spanish and expediting my process. Now the true problem comes with testing myself. What if I'm learning all of this wrong? I would never know. It was much easier with a teacher there to keep me focussed and make sure that I learned the concepts correctly. Jaime may have given me a lot of homework, but ultimately I knew it was beneficial to me and my learning process. I don't know how to test myself on this information! I guess I could go to one of Lovett's Spanish teachers for help, but I'm not entirely sure. I've been seriously thinking about taking some Spanish and French classes over the summer and definitely in college so if anything these self-taught lessons will definitely help with that.
I also did a little bit more research today. I had an earlier post dedicated to Rape Culture in Guatemala, but that was just an on-the-surface look. I wanted to dig a little deeper so I started reading about violence against women and I was shocked at what I found. In 2014, 5,100 girls under the age of 15 got pregnant in Guatemala. That statistic alone accounts for at at least a third of the girls in the shelter that I worked at in Guatemala. All of them were 18 and younger and a few of them were 16 year olds with children 2 or 3 years old, meaning that two years ago they were a part of that statistic. Furthermore the statistic continues to grow. Between 2012 and 2013 the amount of underage pregnancies in Guatemala increased by 25% and it's projected to increase even further. What's even more disturbing is that most of these pregnancies are caused by a family member, most notably the father. In Guatemala 1 in 4 rape cases note the rapist as the girl's father and 89% of rape cases involve a family member or someone known to the family. Lastly there is a limited amount of sexual education afforded to young boys and girls in Guatemala as it is a Catholic county and the Catholicism advocates for reduced sexual education for fear that it might encourage young people to have sex. Thus many teenagers in Guatemala have sex without even knowing the risks or issues that come along with it.
This information explained a lot for me, but it also really frightened me. Many of the girls in the shelter were very reluctant to share their story or talk about their problems with us volunteers, especially Kit and I as we weren't there that long and they didn't trust us very much. Seely probably had the best relationship with the girls as she'd been at the shelter for over a month when Kit and I had arrived, but even then I remember her telling me that the girls had just gotten comfortable with her. This information tells us why. It's really scary knowing all of this and that these kinds of experiences might be what happened to the girls at the shelter. More than anything it angered me. I was unnerved by simple cat-calling and disrespect in the streets but these young girls have to deal with so much more. I'm so grateful that the shelter has opened up and provided a place for battered girls to live, learn and recuperate from their tragedies. Slowly, but surely that are making progress. Not only do their classes consist of basic learning like math, english, writing etc. but they also had classes about basic relationship education (no matter what has happened to the girls sexual education is still out of the question because of the religion in Guatemala). Kit told me about how she sat in on a class where they told the girls about what a good boyfriend was (and only a boyfriend, Guatemala is a pretty homophobic country), how he should treat them and even his age range (some of the girls took to dating men 2 or even 3 times their own age).
Reading all the information about Guatemalan Rape Culture has brought me back to one of my first experiences in Guatemala. When Kit and I first got off the plane and went over to customs, we saw a sign that said (in Spanish. Kit had to read it to me) if you don't want to be arrested in Guatemala, don't have sex with underage girls. At first we were shocked, but then we laughed at how ridiculous the sign was. Did they really need a sign to say that? My experiences at the shelter and the information I read today explains exactly why that sign was necessary. However, I do want to note that some statistics for rape and violence against women in the U.S. are just as bad. These only seem heightened for me because it's a foreign country, one that I am not used to living in. 44% of rape victims in the U.S. are under 18 and 80% are under 30, yet somehow I still feel relatively safe walking around in the streets on my own Native Atlanta, which also happens to have the largest industry for human sex-trafficking in America. I note this to say that these things happen everywhere. Under no circumstances am I saying that this information shouldn't be shocking or regarded harshly, but I'm noting how things outside of our own country can seem out of context considering we don't live there and we don't know what life like there is like.
I learned some really unnerving things today, but it went towards better understanding the culture I lived in for two weeks. I now understand even more so why in the dead of summer every girl on the street in Guatemala was either wearing long pants or a long skirt. I now understand so much more so than I did before and it's a little disturbing to think this was information I didn't know beforehand. It was an error in research on my part. Overall I think I had a very successful day and I look forward to doing more tomorrow.
Sincerely,
Journey
Today I got back to normal or at least the normal that I had before I went to Guatemala. The disillusionment has warn off and I'm ready to go back to work as it was before I left. I started looking through pictures today of what we can and can't use in our final presentation. Turns out we didn't take that many pictures at all. We have some pictures from excursions and the ones that A Broader View took, but otherwise there aren't that many to go off of. In fact one could say, "Where are the pictures? Did you even go?" and be completely justified, but I'm justified too in saying that we had a very good reason.
Safety was a large concern in Guatemala and we were often advised not to take out our phones or any expensive looking cameras while out on the streets for fear of being robbed. Being tourists and clearly not from Guatemala made Kit and I targets, something I desperately wanted to avoid. This unfortunately reduced our photography, but I hope that won't make our project look bad. A picture may be worth a thousand words, but Kit and I definitely have more than a thousand words to explain about this experience both good and bad. Also we each had to do an exit video for A Broader View where we explained our project (with A Broader View not our Lovett one), what it meant to us, what we learned and gave a general overview of our entire experience. Later in the week I'm going to edit and piece together Kit and I's respective videos and add in some pictures to use possibly in our presentation for the board and/or for the presentation in front of the school.
Besides presentation work I also did some more Spanish studying today. I'm still working on Past Tense, specifically the preterite. Honestly when teaching yourself a language it's hard to know how fast to pace yourself. In my french class we worked on Passe compose for maybe two weeks, but it seems odd to think I could be working on the preterite for two weeks when it seems to be a concept that I'm (or at least I think I am) grasping pretty well. I think my previous escapades in language (most notably french) has really been helping with my understanding of Spanish and expediting my process. Now the true problem comes with testing myself. What if I'm learning all of this wrong? I would never know. It was much easier with a teacher there to keep me focussed and make sure that I learned the concepts correctly. Jaime may have given me a lot of homework, but ultimately I knew it was beneficial to me and my learning process. I don't know how to test myself on this information! I guess I could go to one of Lovett's Spanish teachers for help, but I'm not entirely sure. I've been seriously thinking about taking some Spanish and French classes over the summer and definitely in college so if anything these self-taught lessons will definitely help with that.
I also did a little bit more research today. I had an earlier post dedicated to Rape Culture in Guatemala, but that was just an on-the-surface look. I wanted to dig a little deeper so I started reading about violence against women and I was shocked at what I found. In 2014, 5,100 girls under the age of 15 got pregnant in Guatemala. That statistic alone accounts for at at least a third of the girls in the shelter that I worked at in Guatemala. All of them were 18 and younger and a few of them were 16 year olds with children 2 or 3 years old, meaning that two years ago they were a part of that statistic. Furthermore the statistic continues to grow. Between 2012 and 2013 the amount of underage pregnancies in Guatemala increased by 25% and it's projected to increase even further. What's even more disturbing is that most of these pregnancies are caused by a family member, most notably the father. In Guatemala 1 in 4 rape cases note the rapist as the girl's father and 89% of rape cases involve a family member or someone known to the family. Lastly there is a limited amount of sexual education afforded to young boys and girls in Guatemala as it is a Catholic county and the Catholicism advocates for reduced sexual education for fear that it might encourage young people to have sex. Thus many teenagers in Guatemala have sex without even knowing the risks or issues that come along with it.
This information explained a lot for me, but it also really frightened me. Many of the girls in the shelter were very reluctant to share their story or talk about their problems with us volunteers, especially Kit and I as we weren't there that long and they didn't trust us very much. Seely probably had the best relationship with the girls as she'd been at the shelter for over a month when Kit and I had arrived, but even then I remember her telling me that the girls had just gotten comfortable with her. This information tells us why. It's really scary knowing all of this and that these kinds of experiences might be what happened to the girls at the shelter. More than anything it angered me. I was unnerved by simple cat-calling and disrespect in the streets but these young girls have to deal with so much more. I'm so grateful that the shelter has opened up and provided a place for battered girls to live, learn and recuperate from their tragedies. Slowly, but surely that are making progress. Not only do their classes consist of basic learning like math, english, writing etc. but they also had classes about basic relationship education (no matter what has happened to the girls sexual education is still out of the question because of the religion in Guatemala). Kit told me about how she sat in on a class where they told the girls about what a good boyfriend was (and only a boyfriend, Guatemala is a pretty homophobic country), how he should treat them and even his age range (some of the girls took to dating men 2 or even 3 times their own age).
Reading all the information about Guatemalan Rape Culture has brought me back to one of my first experiences in Guatemala. When Kit and I first got off the plane and went over to customs, we saw a sign that said (in Spanish. Kit had to read it to me) if you don't want to be arrested in Guatemala, don't have sex with underage girls. At first we were shocked, but then we laughed at how ridiculous the sign was. Did they really need a sign to say that? My experiences at the shelter and the information I read today explains exactly why that sign was necessary. However, I do want to note that some statistics for rape and violence against women in the U.S. are just as bad. These only seem heightened for me because it's a foreign country, one that I am not used to living in. 44% of rape victims in the U.S. are under 18 and 80% are under 30, yet somehow I still feel relatively safe walking around in the streets on my own Native Atlanta, which also happens to have the largest industry for human sex-trafficking in America. I note this to say that these things happen everywhere. Under no circumstances am I saying that this information shouldn't be shocking or regarded harshly, but I'm noting how things outside of our own country can seem out of context considering we don't live there and we don't know what life like there is like.
I learned some really unnerving things today, but it went towards better understanding the culture I lived in for two weeks. I now understand even more so why in the dead of summer every girl on the street in Guatemala was either wearing long pants or a long skirt. I now understand so much more so than I did before and it's a little disturbing to think this was information I didn't know beforehand. It was an error in research on my part. Overall I think I had a very successful day and I look forward to doing more tomorrow.
Sincerely,
Journey
Day 17: Mondays suck
Dear Reader,
Have you ever experienced the disillusion that comes with returning from a trip? I'm two days back from Guatemala and I've pretty much just settled back into how my life was before I left. My mom is still yelling at me to clean my room (and I probably should cause it is pretty dirty). I'm still perpetually late to everything (today was the college t-shirt picture day and I missed it so basically according to Lovett archives I'm not going to college?). And most of all Mondays still suck. The only thing that actually has changed (not for the better) is that AP exams are much closer than they were 3 weeks ago, leaving me certifiably screwed, but lets talk less about my whiny teenage problems and more about the project shall we?
True to my promise I'm still studying and learning Spanish. I did four hours of work today, brushing up on the notes I took while in Guatemala learning with Jaime as well as using Duolingo and the Spanish website that I'd used before going to Guatemala. I feel like I'm pretty well versed in present tense so I decided that I would start learning how to use the past tense. In spanish there are two tenses used for the past. There is the preterite and then there is the imperfect. Today I started the preterite which is similar to Passe Compose in French. The preterite is used: to talk about a series of past actions, to talk about the beginning or end of a past occurrence and to talk about completed actions. Those are basically the same ways that I learned the Passe Compose was used so from that perspective it's not very difficult; however, memorizing all of the verb forms for the preterite is. I know I'll be working on this for at least today and tomorrow, while continuing to study and restudy what I learned in Guatemala. I kind of have this irrational fear that I'll wake up and have forgotten it all (that's low key how I feel about french as well) so I'll continue to study the vocab and make quizlets for it. I didn't get to this today, but I'm thinking about watching Spanish movies and listening to Spanish movies to also boost my learning of the Spanish language.
I met with Kit today as well and we talked a little bit about what we'll be doing for the next week. As I wrote in an earlier post, she's doing presentations to Lovett Spanish classes about our trip and it's benefits. We just talked about how she's going to formulate her presentations, because her format for these presentations will be very similar to our presentation in front of the board. We'll be making a powerpoint presentation, separating it into parts or the different aspects of Guatemala that we researched and learned about while we were there. We talked logistics and info for two hours before parting our separate ways.
Today was a good day for me. I think I made some strides with my project not only in the realm of Spanish, but also in defining for myself what this project has meant for me. Life abroad is very different from life back at home. At home I'm given a rather carefree existence (with the exception of APs and schoolwork), in Guatemala I took on lots of responsibilities and duties. I was a care-taker, a volunteer, a donator, a guest, an adult, and a woman (not a girl); I was more than I've ever had to be and I'm not sure I lost those identities when I left Guatemala either. It was good to diversify myself and be something that I'm not usually, to be a part of something bigger. Not only did my help give benefit to the shelter, but it also changed me too. I'm a better person for my experience and that's something I'll always be grateful for.
Sincerely,
Journey
Have you ever experienced the disillusion that comes with returning from a trip? I'm two days back from Guatemala and I've pretty much just settled back into how my life was before I left. My mom is still yelling at me to clean my room (and I probably should cause it is pretty dirty). I'm still perpetually late to everything (today was the college t-shirt picture day and I missed it so basically according to Lovett archives I'm not going to college?). And most of all Mondays still suck. The only thing that actually has changed (not for the better) is that AP exams are much closer than they were 3 weeks ago, leaving me certifiably screwed, but lets talk less about my whiny teenage problems and more about the project shall we?
True to my promise I'm still studying and learning Spanish. I did four hours of work today, brushing up on the notes I took while in Guatemala learning with Jaime as well as using Duolingo and the Spanish website that I'd used before going to Guatemala. I feel like I'm pretty well versed in present tense so I decided that I would start learning how to use the past tense. In spanish there are two tenses used for the past. There is the preterite and then there is the imperfect. Today I started the preterite which is similar to Passe Compose in French. The preterite is used: to talk about a series of past actions, to talk about the beginning or end of a past occurrence and to talk about completed actions. Those are basically the same ways that I learned the Passe Compose was used so from that perspective it's not very difficult; however, memorizing all of the verb forms for the preterite is. I know I'll be working on this for at least today and tomorrow, while continuing to study and restudy what I learned in Guatemala. I kind of have this irrational fear that I'll wake up and have forgotten it all (that's low key how I feel about french as well) so I'll continue to study the vocab and make quizlets for it. I didn't get to this today, but I'm thinking about watching Spanish movies and listening to Spanish movies to also boost my learning of the Spanish language.
I met with Kit today as well and we talked a little bit about what we'll be doing for the next week. As I wrote in an earlier post, she's doing presentations to Lovett Spanish classes about our trip and it's benefits. We just talked about how she's going to formulate her presentations, because her format for these presentations will be very similar to our presentation in front of the board. We'll be making a powerpoint presentation, separating it into parts or the different aspects of Guatemala that we researched and learned about while we were there. We talked logistics and info for two hours before parting our separate ways.
Today was a good day for me. I think I made some strides with my project not only in the realm of Spanish, but also in defining for myself what this project has meant for me. Life abroad is very different from life back at home. At home I'm given a rather carefree existence (with the exception of APs and schoolwork), in Guatemala I took on lots of responsibilities and duties. I was a care-taker, a volunteer, a donator, a guest, an adult, and a woman (not a girl); I was more than I've ever had to be and I'm not sure I lost those identities when I left Guatemala either. It was good to diversify myself and be something that I'm not usually, to be a part of something bigger. Not only did my help give benefit to the shelter, but it also changed me too. I'm a better person for my experience and that's something I'll always be grateful for.
Sincerely,
Journey
Wednesday, April 27, 2016
Day 16: Self medicating my way through hell
Dear Reader,
I saw a lot today. I saw Quezeltanango at 3am. I saw (and felt) what twisty mountain roads are like while high on Benadryl. I saw what Guatemala City traffic looks like (heads up, it absolutely sucks). And finally I saw my Dad in skinny jeans (the jury is still out on that one). It was travel day and it was unappealing to say the least. As I'm writing this, I've never been more physically exhausted in my life. My head is spinning as I'm trying to understand how I woke up in Guatemala just a mere 17 hours ago and finally I'm sitting here on my bed trying to stay conscious as I write today's daily reflection.
It's dark at 3am, like insanely dark, like I can't tell what is part of my body and what is not kind of dark. So it's no wonder that in pursuit of the bathroom, which is just a mere 5-7 feet from our room, I stumbled and fell about 3 times (I'm very uncoordinated). I blame it on the fact that my body wasn't awake yet. In fact, I'd go as far to say that from about 3am to 10am I wasn't actually alive; I was just sleep walking. That's my only real explanation of this disastrous morning out of a horror movie. To be honest, I don't even really remember much of it. One second I was stumbling to the bathroom, the next I was hugging Griselda and telling her goodbye. I lost/forgot a solid 30 minutes of my life and I didn't even care because it was simply too early.
We took a taxi ride over to the bust station and during our 15 minute wait (we got there at 3:55 and the bus started boarding at 4:10), I painstakingly tried to prepare myself for the 4 hour bus ride that was to come. On the way here, I didn't know what I was getting into. There was nothing for me to worry about, because I didn't know how bad the bus ride would be. Before getting on the bus to go back home the only thing I can think about is how horrible the first ride was and I'm terrified that this will be the same or worse. Luckily a few days before Kit and I hatched a plan for both of our sakes. During our amazing hike to see the volcano, Kit and I both caught colds. For the past week to combat congestion we'd been taking Benadryl. Although I felt better by Tuesday, I got sick again on Wednesday after the market. Basically the plan was to take 2 Benadryl to combat congestion (and I was really congested this morning. I couldn't breath through my nose) and pass out while on the bus. In other words, I self-medicated my way through hell and I don't regret it. My fear of the bus ride was very unwarranted. I was awake for maybe the first 20 minutes of the bus ride, but then I was out. I don't really remember falling asleep, but when I woke up we were just outside of Guatemala city. It was pretty great!
Once we arrived at the bus station, we got a taxi to the Guatemala City airport. We payed the taxi and then proceeded to check in and go to the Delta counter. Unfortunately, the delta counter didn't open until 10:30 and it was 9:00 so we waited it out for a bit. Kit was resourceful with her time and wrote her daily reflection. I, on the other hand, settled down to read a good book. When 10:30 finally rolled around we handed over our baggage, went through security and then started walking to the gate. Not willing to taste test Guatemalan fast food (in hindsight we really should've, it would've been an interesting comparison to Senora's home cooked meals) we just went to McDonalds for lunch. This was turning into somewhat of a pattern, but hey Mick D’s has some quality food, though I can't say I will be eating it now that I'm back to the U.S. One of the saving graces of Guatemalan McDonald's was the likely hood that the chicken they used was not the hormone filled stuff that they serve in the U.S. In spite of that, my sandwich, which I was actually kind of excited for, wasn't exactly five star dining, but the fries, as always, were very good. Over lunch we talked about what we were most excited for with coming back home. Kit was excited for American food and not having a carb with every meal and I was excited for my own bed and a hot shower (the shower was always cold in Guatemala).
After lunch we had a few hours to kill (it was like 11:00 and our flight left at 1:15) so we went shopping through the airport. Most of the shop-keepers spoke English, but that didn't stop me from asking (or at least trying to ask) questions in Spanish. I had 33Q to burn through and I was ready. The exchange rate was 7.74Q for $1, which meant if I tried to exchange my money I'd get less than $5 in return, not counting whatever exchange fee there would be. Basically it was better for me to just spend my money rather than save it or try to exchange it. I settled for four knit bracelets that said Guatemala on them. They weren't exactly the hallmark of culture and in no way could represent the experience I'd had, but they were cute and worth the 32Q I put down for them. I'm not usually the type to buy trinkets and gifts for myself while on vacation, but I know that these bracelets will always hold special significance for me.
After shopping we still had more time to kill so we went to a restaurant for wifi, because unlike the Atlanta airport, there is no general free airport wifi in the Guatemala city airport. We ordered some drinks (once again in spanish) and settled down to wait it out for the last 45 minutes until our flight started boarding. Kit once again did the responsible thing and worked on her blog, while I continued reading my book (it's called Daughter of Smoke and Bone and it's AMAZING). When we were done, I, alone, (big emphasis on alone because Kit usually has to help me with the Spanish stuff) asked our waiter for the check and settled our tab. This felt like a really big step for me. It was another moment when I could show just how much I'd learned in only 2 weeks time. I felt so proud of myself and that's when I decided that I couldn't let my knowledge go to waste. I would continue learning and practicing even after we got back to the U.S.
To make a long story (cause all of my blogs are excessively long) shorter, Kit and I boarded our flight and in a short 3 hours found ourselves back home in Atlanta. We got our bags, went through boarder control and security, found our families in the airport lobby and parted ways. I was on my way home one of the things I missed most while on this trip, my bed (yes I missed my family too, but I can't sleep on my parents at least not comfortably anyway). It's now 10:30 and while my bed is comfy, somehow I'm still awake and thus I writing this reflection. I'd say that overall today was long and exhausting. As I've said before, I'm going to miss Guatemala, but I'm also really excited to be back home. I can already tell that this weekend will be one full of laziness and sleep, which I'd like to start on right now. Good night Reader!
Sincerely,
Journey
Day 15: Adios, Ciao, Peace out!
Dear Reader,
Today was my last full day in Guatemala and honestly I'm just trying to process it all. How did time go by so quickly? It feels like we arrived here just yesterday and now we're already leaving?! It's funny that's how high school felt (well everything except junior year. I'm convinced I spent a whole decade sitting in American Studies class). I guess the point I'm trying to prove is that time flies when you're having fun and now I have to leave this beautiful place that I've come to love. I don't really know how to feel about that quite yet, but before I get into the emotional gushy gushy let me talk about my day.
I woke up this morning at 7:00, got dressed and ate a nutritional breakfast of banana pancakes. Today Kit and I were on a slightly different schedule on account of having bought all of the donations yesterday. Instead of heading straight to the shelter like every other day, we headed for the A Broader View office to pick up the donations and (with Petra's and Cœn's help) drag them all the way to the shelter to pass out and distribute to the girls. We got to the shelter at about 9:30 and then they made a catalog of all the items we donated. They'd also just recently received donations of shoes and were sorting those out as well so while they did that Kit and I proceeded to film our A Broader View goodbye videos. These are required by the program and are an opportunity to enlighten others about the benefits of the program, what to expect and any tips that we have. Kit and I both filmed our respective parts, both of which were about 3 minutes each. After filming we went back inside to check and see if the staff needed any more help with passing out donations.
We were ushered into the office to begin the donation process. Essentially what would happen is that each girl would come up the desk in the office and say what item of clothing they need the most. It was then Kit and I's job to write the girl's name on her garment (to avoid stealing) and then give it to her. All the girls were grateful for their new clothes, but some were more nervous then others about taking them. Petra had been saying through out most of our time at the shelter that we were models and inspirations for the girls (Being American sometimes gives you that persona in foreign countries for reasons I don't completely understand). It never really hit me until today. I saw it in the way the girls watched us and how embarrassed they were sometimes to admit what they needed. They were afraid of us judging them and their situation.
The whole time we volunteered I considered the position of myself, other volunteers and even the kids, but I never completely considered the positions of the girls, being placed in the shelter so that they could learn and be able to provide for their children. In the beginning it's probably very scary to come to this new place and try to trust these new people even though the people that you trusted in your past may have betrayed you. Also, one probably has a lot doubts and regrets about their pasts as well. Some days Kit and I would come to the shelter and find that some of the girls had cried or that their eyes were really red-rimmed. I don't pretend to know at all the entire situation of the girls in the shelter, but when I really think about it I can empathize with the situations they are in. I can only hope that our time and donations has gone to giving them hope about their situations. I hope they believe in themselves and their abilities, learning to shed their pasts for a beautiful future.
After passing out supplies we went to talk to the nurse about being able to visit the sick baby in the hospital. These plans had been in the works for the last few days, but today seemed to finally be the day when we would be able to see him. Unfortunately luck was not on our side as our schedules did not permit us the time to visit the baby. The nurse however, showed us pictures of the baby to tell us he was in better health. I was happy to note he'd grown and gained back all the weight he'd lost while being sick.He was still on the ventilator and they had to tube feed him, but the nurse assured us that he was in the best hands and was continuing to improve his condition everyday. Kit and I then went back up to the baby room to finish out our last day of volunteering. Today was an easy day. There wasn't a lot of crying or poopie diapers. It was just a day surrounded by kids just being kids. Kit and I noticed how some kids were already wearing the socks we'd just given them and shared expressions of glee. Today was more of a reflection day for me. I realized that even through my frustrations, I was really going to miss the shelter and the kids. This experience has changed me in more ways then I can count. It's given me an opportunity to grow and develop as a person, to see the world though the eyes of others. I'm glad I did this.
Once work was over, Kit and I walked home for lunch. Lunch was the most amazing food I'd ever had in my life. We had the Guatemalan version of chili with rice, guacamole and tortillas. It was a lunch that reminded that I was definitely going to miss Senora's food. I took up seconds and thirds on this meal just because it was that great. Yeah, at this point I was convinced that Senora needed to write a cook book so I could make these things at home. After lunch I went to study for Spanish. Jaime had given me another 20 verbs to learn and memorize and this time they weren't as easy as Recomendar, so I actually had to put some effort into it. At 2:15 Kit and I walked over to the cafe for our last Spanish lesson.
We started off learning more verbs, but very easily got off topic, especially when I had to tell Jaime that it was my last day of Spanish class. When Kit and I changed our flights from Monday to Friday, he's one of the people I forgot to give the information to, so we had a long conversation about that or more like an misunderstanding. I now know that if you agree with a negative statement in Spanish you are supposed to say Correcto instead of si. Apparently if you say si, you are disagreeing with the comment. So when Jaime said, "Nosotros no tenemos la classe de espanol manana?" (We don't have panish class tomorrow) and I replied "Si," I was actually saying, "Yes we do have class" when I meant the opposite. It's safe to say that that was a 15 minute conversation no doubt heard by the whole cafe (frustration makes people loud). We also talked about popular spanish music and stars like Shakira, Ricky Martin, Enrique Iglesias and more. I also learned more about Jaime's family today. He told me that his parents and grandparents were indigenous Mayans and that he knew 3 different mayan languages: K'iche, Kaqchikel and Mam. I got him to speak all 3 of them to me all of them differing completely from any language I had ever heard before. For the last hour of class we played games with Kit and Salvador, namely Spanish apples to apples, memory and charades. It was a lot of fun! The perfect way to spend my last Spanish class!
Overall today was a great day, better then I could've asked for. It's really sad thinking that this is my last day in Guatemala. I've really enjoyed my time here, but I'm also really happy to go home. By this time tomorrow I'll be back home sleeping in my bed. For the next week Kit will be doing presentations for various Spanish classes, while I'll be brushing up on some last minute research, continuing my spanish (You gotta use it or you lose it right?), and gathering more donations for the shelter. I can't believe how fast this project has gone, but I'm excited to finish it out in the best way that I can.
Sincerely,
Journey White
Today was my last full day in Guatemala and honestly I'm just trying to process it all. How did time go by so quickly? It feels like we arrived here just yesterday and now we're already leaving?! It's funny that's how high school felt (well everything except junior year. I'm convinced I spent a whole decade sitting in American Studies class). I guess the point I'm trying to prove is that time flies when you're having fun and now I have to leave this beautiful place that I've come to love. I don't really know how to feel about that quite yet, but before I get into the emotional gushy gushy let me talk about my day.
I woke up this morning at 7:00, got dressed and ate a nutritional breakfast of banana pancakes. Today Kit and I were on a slightly different schedule on account of having bought all of the donations yesterday. Instead of heading straight to the shelter like every other day, we headed for the A Broader View office to pick up the donations and (with Petra's and Cœn's help) drag them all the way to the shelter to pass out and distribute to the girls. We got to the shelter at about 9:30 and then they made a catalog of all the items we donated. They'd also just recently received donations of shoes and were sorting those out as well so while they did that Kit and I proceeded to film our A Broader View goodbye videos. These are required by the program and are an opportunity to enlighten others about the benefits of the program, what to expect and any tips that we have. Kit and I both filmed our respective parts, both of which were about 3 minutes each. After filming we went back inside to check and see if the staff needed any more help with passing out donations.
We were ushered into the office to begin the donation process. Essentially what would happen is that each girl would come up the desk in the office and say what item of clothing they need the most. It was then Kit and I's job to write the girl's name on her garment (to avoid stealing) and then give it to her. All the girls were grateful for their new clothes, but some were more nervous then others about taking them. Petra had been saying through out most of our time at the shelter that we were models and inspirations for the girls (Being American sometimes gives you that persona in foreign countries for reasons I don't completely understand). It never really hit me until today. I saw it in the way the girls watched us and how embarrassed they were sometimes to admit what they needed. They were afraid of us judging them and their situation.
The whole time we volunteered I considered the position of myself, other volunteers and even the kids, but I never completely considered the positions of the girls, being placed in the shelter so that they could learn and be able to provide for their children. In the beginning it's probably very scary to come to this new place and try to trust these new people even though the people that you trusted in your past may have betrayed you. Also, one probably has a lot doubts and regrets about their pasts as well. Some days Kit and I would come to the shelter and find that some of the girls had cried or that their eyes were really red-rimmed. I don't pretend to know at all the entire situation of the girls in the shelter, but when I really think about it I can empathize with the situations they are in. I can only hope that our time and donations has gone to giving them hope about their situations. I hope they believe in themselves and their abilities, learning to shed their pasts for a beautiful future.
After passing out supplies we went to talk to the nurse about being able to visit the sick baby in the hospital. These plans had been in the works for the last few days, but today seemed to finally be the day when we would be able to see him. Unfortunately luck was not on our side as our schedules did not permit us the time to visit the baby. The nurse however, showed us pictures of the baby to tell us he was in better health. I was happy to note he'd grown and gained back all the weight he'd lost while being sick.He was still on the ventilator and they had to tube feed him, but the nurse assured us that he was in the best hands and was continuing to improve his condition everyday. Kit and I then went back up to the baby room to finish out our last day of volunteering. Today was an easy day. There wasn't a lot of crying or poopie diapers. It was just a day surrounded by kids just being kids. Kit and I noticed how some kids were already wearing the socks we'd just given them and shared expressions of glee. Today was more of a reflection day for me. I realized that even through my frustrations, I was really going to miss the shelter and the kids. This experience has changed me in more ways then I can count. It's given me an opportunity to grow and develop as a person, to see the world though the eyes of others. I'm glad I did this.
Once work was over, Kit and I walked home for lunch. Lunch was the most amazing food I'd ever had in my life. We had the Guatemalan version of chili with rice, guacamole and tortillas. It was a lunch that reminded that I was definitely going to miss Senora's food. I took up seconds and thirds on this meal just because it was that great. Yeah, at this point I was convinced that Senora needed to write a cook book so I could make these things at home. After lunch I went to study for Spanish. Jaime had given me another 20 verbs to learn and memorize and this time they weren't as easy as Recomendar, so I actually had to put some effort into it. At 2:15 Kit and I walked over to the cafe for our last Spanish lesson.
We started off learning more verbs, but very easily got off topic, especially when I had to tell Jaime that it was my last day of Spanish class. When Kit and I changed our flights from Monday to Friday, he's one of the people I forgot to give the information to, so we had a long conversation about that or more like an misunderstanding. I now know that if you agree with a negative statement in Spanish you are supposed to say Correcto instead of si. Apparently if you say si, you are disagreeing with the comment. So when Jaime said, "Nosotros no tenemos la classe de espanol manana?" (We don't have panish class tomorrow) and I replied "Si," I was actually saying, "Yes we do have class" when I meant the opposite. It's safe to say that that was a 15 minute conversation no doubt heard by the whole cafe (frustration makes people loud). We also talked about popular spanish music and stars like Shakira, Ricky Martin, Enrique Iglesias and more. I also learned more about Jaime's family today. He told me that his parents and grandparents were indigenous Mayans and that he knew 3 different mayan languages: K'iche, Kaqchikel and Mam. I got him to speak all 3 of them to me all of them differing completely from any language I had ever heard before. For the last hour of class we played games with Kit and Salvador, namely Spanish apples to apples, memory and charades. It was a lot of fun! The perfect way to spend my last Spanish class!
Overall today was a great day, better then I could've asked for. It's really sad thinking that this is my last day in Guatemala. I've really enjoyed my time here, but I'm also really happy to go home. By this time tomorrow I'll be back home sleeping in my bed. For the next week Kit will be doing presentations for various Spanish classes, while I'll be brushing up on some last minute research, continuing my spanish (You gotta use it or you lose it right?), and gathering more donations for the shelter. I can't believe how fast this project has gone, but I'm excited to finish it out in the best way that I can.
Sincerely,
Journey White
Tuesday, April 26, 2016
Day 14: Pineapple will never be the same
Dear Reader,
Today I was so ready. Ready for what you might ask? I was ready to leave. Today Kit and I left the orphanage 8 minutes earlier because I thought I was going to lose my mind and the only way to fix it seemed to be a stop a McDonalds for not only a McFlurry, but also an apple pie. Yeah, it was that bad. I'll start from the beginning.
Today started off as a pretty normal day. I woke up, showered, got dressed and then went to the kitchen to have breakfast, which was french toast (yum!). Kit and I then headed for the shelter at 8:15 and that's when things started going down hill. First of all when we arrived almost all of the babies were either crying, screaming, or both. And let me just say 20 vs. 2 is not exactly fair. We took sides of the room strategically going from baby to baby to hold them and calm them down. Within 45 minutes we were able to turn a hurricane into a calm storm, but that was enough craziness to tell me that today was not going to be fun. In hindsight today was just as stressful as any day and being an unaccustomed 18 year old who is definitely not ready to have a kid was probably a huge factor in making the day as bad as I thought it was. Also, today I had to change the dirtiest diaper I have ever seen in my life. I swear this kid had a nuclear reaction happen in his pants and it took two of us (Seely and I) to change him.
Jose is a 3 year old who should probably no longer be in diapers, but considering most of the kids in the orphanage are behind due to reduced resources, it's not surprising that he still wears them. However, even though Jose still wears diapers, he lets all of us know that he is no longer a child, thus he resists and refuses to have anyone change his diaper. In fact, Seely told me the last time she changed him, he kicked her in the face hence why I was there: to be the man-power and hold him down. The only thing worse then having to change Jose's dirty diaper was the fact that he'd eaten pineapple just before...and had gotten it all over his clothes. So not only did he smell like rancid poop and diarrhea (remember all the kids have that mysterious disease that gives them diarrhea and stomach cramps), but he also smelled like pineapples, one of my favorite fruits or it used to be anyway. For me, pineapple will never be the same.
Jose immediately knew what was happening. All we did was put him on the bed and he started kicking and screaming. I instantly pushed his arms and chest down to reduce the flailing while Seely went for the diaper. Jose already smelled pretty bad with his clothes on, but with his clothes off, the smell had no layers to fight through in order to get to our noses. It was disgusting and my gag reflex kicked in immediately. I usually have a pretty strong stomach, but I almost vomited on this kid right then and there and it didn't help that he was kicking his legs and flinging poop everywhere. It was overall a horrible experience, one that I know I won't be forgetting anytime soon. Seely and I did eventually get Jose cleaned up and into a brand new diaper and while Seely went to the bathroom to wash the poop off her hands, I proceeded to put Jose into new clothes, something he also didn't like. Jose just didn't like when people touched him in general.
I know this was a humorous story where I was able to exercise my ability of brilliant comedic timing and my flawless complaining skills, but it did actually have a point. Jose's not the only 3 year old at the shelter still wearing diapers, that hasn't started reading or learning and is essentially living the life of a child under one years old. Many of the kids in the orphanage are in his same position, but they shouldn't be and that's not necessarily the fault of the shelter, but their limited resources. At 3 years old I was already potty-trained and I'd started reading on my own, but these kids haven't come anywhere close to that. The shelter is already understaffed meaning they barely have all the resources and the teachers to the teach the girls let alone their children. Also there are no resources at the shelter to support potty training the kids either. In fact, the baby room in the shelter is not even baby proofed. Seely and I often find child dangers such as way-ward pencils and pens in the possession of the kids. What's amazing to me is that even with all of these problems the shelter just keeps running. I know I've said this many times, but every once in a while I just look around the shelter and I wonder how it's able to keep going. They survive on minimal donations and the shear will of the girls and the people that work there. It continues to astound me everyday. The set-backs also serve to push me harder as a volunteer and a worker. I wanna be the very best I can be for these kids, so I may complain, I may scream in frustration (and come very close to crying), but at the end of the day it's for a good cause. It's for something that I believe in. I may not be able to give these kids all the opportunities I've had, but I try like hell to do so.
Once Kit and I left the orphanage (again 8 minutes early), we started our walk home and ended up at good old McDonald's just a few blocks from our host family. Early on Kit and I made a deal that we'd go to McDonald's whenever we missed home or one of us had a really bad day. McDonald's might just be another fast food place, but for us in a foreign country it's a tie to home and in some weird way it's really comforting. We went inside, waited a little bit (the Mcflurry machine needed to warm up...or at least I think that's what they said. We all know my spanish isn't that great so...), used the wifi and talked about home. We both then ordered respective Mcflurries and McDonald's apple pies. I know it's fattening (tell that to my widening hips and thighs), but it was sooooo good and just what I needed.
I went to Spanish class that day renewed and recharged. Today we had a special Spanish class. Jaime, Kit, Seely, Seely's Spanish teacher, Salvador (Kit's teacher), Cœn (an A Broader View intern) and I went to the Market to buy donations and supplies for the orphanage. It turned out that the baby from the orphanage in the hospital was able to get a heart test for free from one of the cardiovascular surgeon's that heard his story and how he got to be there. It was really sweet and I was happy to hear that, but it also meant that Kit and I could donate our money in other ways, hence today's visit to the Market. The shelter needed a hoard of things, but here's the general list of what we bought: diapers, toilet paper, panties, bras, lotion, rash cream, baby wipes and socks. We also got great deals on our items on account of Seely's Spanish teacher being 'the queen of the market.' She goes there every week and knows all the best deals, plus she's really great at bargaining. Though I almost died several times, because the market is in the middle of a really busy street with cars continuously passing through, I had a really great time. I didn't talk much, Seely's teacher did most of that, pretty much defeating the purpose of Spanish class, but it was a cool opportunity to experience culture. Many people in Guatemala go to these markets to either buy for their families or provide for their families. In earlier posts I've talked about agriculture, well this was the finishing touch. Farmers plant and grow the crops and then they take them to the markets where people buy them. It's been interesting to see the whole process in the time I've been in Guatemala.
After Spanish class/shopping session, we carried all the stuff, which was super heavy, all the way to the A Broader View office to pick up the following day. Kit and I then walked back to the cafe to finish up what was left of our Spanish lessons and then proceeded home. Today was a great day, in spite of my earlier frustrations and set backs. I did something meaningful today, something that I can be proud of and that means everything to me.
Sincerely,
Journey White
-
Today I was so ready. Ready for what you might ask? I was ready to leave. Today Kit and I left the orphanage 8 minutes earlier because I thought I was going to lose my mind and the only way to fix it seemed to be a stop a McDonalds for not only a McFlurry, but also an apple pie. Yeah, it was that bad. I'll start from the beginning.
Today started off as a pretty normal day. I woke up, showered, got dressed and then went to the kitchen to have breakfast, which was french toast (yum!). Kit and I then headed for the shelter at 8:15 and that's when things started going down hill. First of all when we arrived almost all of the babies were either crying, screaming, or both. And let me just say 20 vs. 2 is not exactly fair. We took sides of the room strategically going from baby to baby to hold them and calm them down. Within 45 minutes we were able to turn a hurricane into a calm storm, but that was enough craziness to tell me that today was not going to be fun. In hindsight today was just as stressful as any day and being an unaccustomed 18 year old who is definitely not ready to have a kid was probably a huge factor in making the day as bad as I thought it was. Also, today I had to change the dirtiest diaper I have ever seen in my life. I swear this kid had a nuclear reaction happen in his pants and it took two of us (Seely and I) to change him.
Jose is a 3 year old who should probably no longer be in diapers, but considering most of the kids in the orphanage are behind due to reduced resources, it's not surprising that he still wears them. However, even though Jose still wears diapers, he lets all of us know that he is no longer a child, thus he resists and refuses to have anyone change his diaper. In fact, Seely told me the last time she changed him, he kicked her in the face hence why I was there: to be the man-power and hold him down. The only thing worse then having to change Jose's dirty diaper was the fact that he'd eaten pineapple just before...and had gotten it all over his clothes. So not only did he smell like rancid poop and diarrhea (remember all the kids have that mysterious disease that gives them diarrhea and stomach cramps), but he also smelled like pineapples, one of my favorite fruits or it used to be anyway. For me, pineapple will never be the same.
Jose immediately knew what was happening. All we did was put him on the bed and he started kicking and screaming. I instantly pushed his arms and chest down to reduce the flailing while Seely went for the diaper. Jose already smelled pretty bad with his clothes on, but with his clothes off, the smell had no layers to fight through in order to get to our noses. It was disgusting and my gag reflex kicked in immediately. I usually have a pretty strong stomach, but I almost vomited on this kid right then and there and it didn't help that he was kicking his legs and flinging poop everywhere. It was overall a horrible experience, one that I know I won't be forgetting anytime soon. Seely and I did eventually get Jose cleaned up and into a brand new diaper and while Seely went to the bathroom to wash the poop off her hands, I proceeded to put Jose into new clothes, something he also didn't like. Jose just didn't like when people touched him in general.
I know this was a humorous story where I was able to exercise my ability of brilliant comedic timing and my flawless complaining skills, but it did actually have a point. Jose's not the only 3 year old at the shelter still wearing diapers, that hasn't started reading or learning and is essentially living the life of a child under one years old. Many of the kids in the orphanage are in his same position, but they shouldn't be and that's not necessarily the fault of the shelter, but their limited resources. At 3 years old I was already potty-trained and I'd started reading on my own, but these kids haven't come anywhere close to that. The shelter is already understaffed meaning they barely have all the resources and the teachers to the teach the girls let alone their children. Also there are no resources at the shelter to support potty training the kids either. In fact, the baby room in the shelter is not even baby proofed. Seely and I often find child dangers such as way-ward pencils and pens in the possession of the kids. What's amazing to me is that even with all of these problems the shelter just keeps running. I know I've said this many times, but every once in a while I just look around the shelter and I wonder how it's able to keep going. They survive on minimal donations and the shear will of the girls and the people that work there. It continues to astound me everyday. The set-backs also serve to push me harder as a volunteer and a worker. I wanna be the very best I can be for these kids, so I may complain, I may scream in frustration (and come very close to crying), but at the end of the day it's for a good cause. It's for something that I believe in. I may not be able to give these kids all the opportunities I've had, but I try like hell to do so.
Once Kit and I left the orphanage (again 8 minutes early), we started our walk home and ended up at good old McDonald's just a few blocks from our host family. Early on Kit and I made a deal that we'd go to McDonald's whenever we missed home or one of us had a really bad day. McDonald's might just be another fast food place, but for us in a foreign country it's a tie to home and in some weird way it's really comforting. We went inside, waited a little bit (the Mcflurry machine needed to warm up...or at least I think that's what they said. We all know my spanish isn't that great so...), used the wifi and talked about home. We both then ordered respective Mcflurries and McDonald's apple pies. I know it's fattening (tell that to my widening hips and thighs), but it was sooooo good and just what I needed.
I went to Spanish class that day renewed and recharged. Today we had a special Spanish class. Jaime, Kit, Seely, Seely's Spanish teacher, Salvador (Kit's teacher), Cœn (an A Broader View intern) and I went to the Market to buy donations and supplies for the orphanage. It turned out that the baby from the orphanage in the hospital was able to get a heart test for free from one of the cardiovascular surgeon's that heard his story and how he got to be there. It was really sweet and I was happy to hear that, but it also meant that Kit and I could donate our money in other ways, hence today's visit to the Market. The shelter needed a hoard of things, but here's the general list of what we bought: diapers, toilet paper, panties, bras, lotion, rash cream, baby wipes and socks. We also got great deals on our items on account of Seely's Spanish teacher being 'the queen of the market.' She goes there every week and knows all the best deals, plus she's really great at bargaining. Though I almost died several times, because the market is in the middle of a really busy street with cars continuously passing through, I had a really great time. I didn't talk much, Seely's teacher did most of that, pretty much defeating the purpose of Spanish class, but it was a cool opportunity to experience culture. Many people in Guatemala go to these markets to either buy for their families or provide for their families. In earlier posts I've talked about agriculture, well this was the finishing touch. Farmers plant and grow the crops and then they take them to the markets where people buy them. It's been interesting to see the whole process in the time I've been in Guatemala.
After Spanish class/shopping session, we carried all the stuff, which was super heavy, all the way to the A Broader View office to pick up the following day. Kit and I then walked back to the cafe to finish up what was left of our Spanish lessons and then proceeded home. Today was a great day, in spite of my earlier frustrations and set backs. I did something meaningful today, something that I can be proud of and that means everything to me.
Sincerely,
Journey White
-
Monday, April 25, 2016
Day 13: Game on!
Dear Reader,
Yesterday's
post was a little heavy so today I hope to go a little lighter and I promise I
won't complain as much as I did yesterday. I was just a little frustrated, but
now I'm of a clearer mind. Today was also a much better day.I woke up this
morning at 7:00 as usual. I got showered, got dressed and ate breakfast. Kit
and I left our host family at 8:15 and headed out for the orphanage.
Uncharacteristically,
I don’t really have many complaints today. The kids mostly slept and the ones
that didn’t sleep didn’t cry all that much so it was pretty nice, but Kit and I
got some pretty devastating news today. Our first day at the orphanage there
was this very sick baby. He had a horrible fever, he’d been gradually losing weight
for the last few weeks (as I was told by Seely) and his mother had stopped
being able to produce milk for him (she was 11 years old so her body couldn’t
support milk production very long). Kit, Seely and I told the nurses our
concerns and then the next day the baby just disappeared. At first we feared
the worse. What if the baby had died? We tried to ask around for information
with no such luck. The only thing we learned was that the baby had gone to the
hospital for a check-up and there was no further information.
Today,
however, we were finally able to get some information. Apparently the baby got
pneumonia (hence the fever, throwup and weightloss) and was now hooked up to a
ventilator. He’d been experiencing heart failure and heart palptations and
needed a really expensive heart test in order for the doctors to determine the
next step in treatment. Kit and I had been planning on donating to the
orphanage and Petra, our coordinator, told us that the test would be the
perfect donation. Kit and I are more than happy to give the money for the
surgery and have started making preparations for expenses. We were told the
price of the surgery was 550Q or approximately $73.33.
This
was one of the moments I was reminded the difference between the standard of
living in America and other countries. In the face of a major heart test, as an
American, to only have to drop $73 to save a life is not much. I know there are
poor and homeless people in America who could not afford this, but I’m talking about
the grand scheme of things. Americans don’t always value all the opportunities
we are afforded by the country we live in. Our higher standard of living gives
us easier lives. I’m finding more and more reasons to be grateful for the life
I’ve been given and that’s one large take-away that I have from this
experience.
Today after the orphanage Kit and I went home for lunch as always. I
then proceeded to our room to do my homework. Today Jaime gave me ‘relatively
light homework,’ his definition not mine. I had to memorize 16 new verbs, which
in hindsight isn’t awful. Thankfully, all I had to know was their meanings, not
their conjugations and luckily a lot of them were English sounding. For
instance I had verbs like Confesar, which means to confess, and recomendar,
which means to recommend. I guess I did
have it relatively easy this time around and I definitely took advantage of
that by reading my book instead of studying (oops). Okay, I didn’t totally blow
it off, it was more half and half, so 30 minutes studying and 30 minutes
reading. To be honest one of the greatest benefits of going to Guatemala is
that I have more time to do pleasure reading. If you know me, then you know
that I am a huge bookworm; however, going to Lovett (and having lots of school
work) doesn’t always afford you a lot time to read for fun. Really, my life in
general doesn’t afford me the time to do a lot of things that I enjoy doing.
It’s funny how going to a foreign country has somehow given me that opportunity
to be more of myself then I usually can be at home. Is that weird?
At
2:15 Kit and I headed out for what possibly might have been the best day of
Spanish lessons ever, because today ladies and gentleman we… played games with
Kit and Salvador!!! I’m talking Go Fish, Charades, Memory, basically all the
games I loved playing with a kid. It was actually an extremely nostalgic
experience. I felt like I was 6 again, except when I was 6 we played in
English, but this was Spanish class. The odds were pretty much stacked against
me. Not only were there 2 men who’ve been speaking Spanish their whole lives,
but there was also Kit who’s only been speaking for 4 years, but is practically
fluent (in my opinion). I, on the other hand, am on day 6 of learning Spanish
and speak on the level of maybe a 3 year old (actually the 3 year olds in the
orphanage speak better than me so even that’s a stretch). From an achievement
stand point, this set up pretty much had me destined for failure or at least I
thought.
It’s
amazing what language and cultural immersion will do for you. I’d spent the
last week not only studying and learning Spanish, but being surrounded by it
everyday. When we played games like Memory and Go fish with vocabulary words, I
was astounded by how much I actually did know, even the words that Jaime and I
hadn’t gone over, but I’d learned just by listening to people talking. My
capacity to connect with and learn another language was shocking. Furthermore,
these games helped me improve myself even more and learn more new words, so
much so that I suggested to Jaime that we do this everyday. Unfortunately he
didn’t take the bait, but I’ll always remember this as the day that Spanish
really clicked for me. Immersion was doing much more for me than I ever knew
and it doesn’t end there.
After
Spanish Kit and I went home for dinner. Over dinner we got into a conversation
with Senora about our respective heritages. We talked about ancestry, religion,
the foods we liked, school and how our days went. Most conversations with
senora have limited input from me with either Kit translating for me or with me
saying a hopefully coherent 3 to 4 word sentence to convey my opinion on the
topic. Today, however, was the first time I really talked to senora myself. Kit
did still have to help me with some words, but it was the first time I had a
real conversation with her and I left the dinner table feeling really proud of
myself. That connection that I feared not having because of the language
barrier was actually coming to fruition.
Today
was actually a really great day for me; I made strides with both language and
culture, proving to myself that if I put my effort in, I can achieve my goals
(which originally was to be able to have a conversation with someone before I
leave). I’m loving how this experience continues to change and shape me. In
this last week, I’m determined to make the best of the experience, to really
soak in the culture as much as I can before I leave. I’m really excited for
tomorrow and hope that I continue to have days as amazing as this one.
Sincerely,
Journey
Wednesday, April 20, 2016
Day 12: Less than nothing. Non-existent.
Dear Reader,
There's one thing that I've been omitting from my posts, but today it's reached its peak. I'm done with catcalling and sexual objectification! Why does being a woman mean I have to deal with this disrespect? Since when does having boobs and a butt give a man a right to belittle me or treat me as if I'm nothing? I've talked about making cultural errors before, but is it a cultural error to be a woman? Some days that's what it feels like. Okay, ranting aside, you are probably very confused. I've never once mentioned the cat-calling, honking, staring or leering in any of my other posts. Maybe it was because it made me uncomfortable or it was something I wanted to ignore. Today showed me that I can't ignore it anymore. I want to be treated fairly. I want my body to stop being an object. I want to stop being an object. Maybe a small post on a Lovett Senior Project blog that no one really reads won't stop sexual harassment and sexual objectification around the world, but today it's enough for me, at least to get my feelings out and come back to normal.
First of all today was a bit irregular for me, because Kit, on account of having food poisoning from drinking Guatemalan tap water, didn't go to work or spanish lessons with me. For the first time I had to travel around Quetzaltenango alone. Maybe that was my first mistake, traveling alone. On average, Kit and I receive 3 cat-calls/whistles a day. Today I counted and I got 4 times as that. Maybe one girl is an easier target than two, I honestly don't know. It's not really something I seek to understand. The day started pretty normal. I got dressed, ate breakfast and packed my bag for the day. I checked on Kit and then left for the orphanage. I was nervous the whole walk to the orphanage, so much so that I practically ran there. Luckily, I was able to avoid attention (the real trouble started in the afternoon). I got a few stares, but that was something I was used to. Guatemala is not a very diverse country. People here are either of purely Mayan heritage or of a combination of Spanish and Mayan decent. Being black, I'm not exactly the average person here. It's a fact that I've become accustomed to.
I got to the orphanage at about 8:35 and immediately went upstairs to start helping with the babies. Today was a surprisingly easy day only made harder by the fact that I was sick. I'd gotten a cold from climbing the mountain on Saturday and was still recovering. The babies' room is always hot, but today it was scorching. I can't count how many time I said "hay calour" (It's hot in here) or "Yo tengo calour" (I am hot). So I spent the next few hours sweating as I changed diapers, comforted crying babies and rocked children to sleep. By the time 12:00 came around I was exhausted and totally not in the mood for anything, but my bed and a 20 hour nap.
The walk was relatively normal to begin with, but then there was a honk, followed by an obnoxious whistle. And that was just the first of many. There were kissy noises (apparently in Guatemala pursing your lips and making the kissing sound is a form of flirtation) followed by "hey baby". Some man even yelled at me from across the street just to get my attention. 1 or 2 cars slowed down (and one even stopped) next to me on the sidewalk to 'proposition' me. In truth they were more spaced out than this. I wasn't cat-called continuously for the entire 20 minute walk, but I might as well been. After the first few I was terrified. I felt dirty and lesser than. I wanted to shed my skin, crawl, and hide. I've never felt so personally violated by the actions of someone else. In these moments I would've given anything to be a man, because being a man in Guatemala guarantees you one thing: respect. Here my femininity and my body make me a target. It's makes me feel like less than nothing, almost non-existent. These people aren't seeing me. They see my 'assets' and then they sum me up based on that alone. I'm not human. I'm a walking set of boobs and a butt. No face. No personality. Nothing. Since when did being a woman mark me as a sexual object? Am I not good for anything, but sex?
These experiences most nearly remind me of my Global Non-violence class. Last semester when I was walking around getting signatures for my senior project form, I introduced myself to Mrs. Switzer (I'd never had her as a teacher before) and then told her that in lieu of my senior project I'd have to unfortunately drop her class in the coming semester. Before I left her room she implored me to think about non-violence while in Guatemala and in what ways the concepts we would learn could be applied or incorporated in Guatemala. To be honest, then I didn't think much of her suggestion. I wasn't coming to Guatemala to be a social activist and start a non-violent revolution. I didn't really understand how anything I would learn in non-violence could apply to my experience in Guatemala. Today, I do.
Before I left for Guatemala, we were talking about the existence and development of Rape Culture around the world. We even watched a video called Half the Sky which talked about the specific Rape culture in certain countries such as Cambodia, India, Sierra Leone and more. In these countries, gradually sexual violence, specifically against women, has been accepted into their society. In Cambodia there were girls as young as four years old being raped and sold into Brothels and in Sierra Leone there were girls 7 years old receiving FGM. It was horrible to watch and lead my class into a discussion about female violence not in these countries, but in our native country, America. We had some trouble identifying Rape Culture in America and that's when Mrs. Switzer informed us that because it's not nearly as overt in our own country, we may not be as prone to noticing it. That came to light for me while being here. It's not that I don't think cat-calling and sexual objectification doesn't exist in America, because it does. It's just that either I don't notice it as much or I'm not usually ina position to experience it (I'm very aware that there are places in Atlanta where a girl shouldn't walk alone). However, where I am in the world shouldn't matter. It should never happen period to any woman. What I've been experiencing is extremely mild compared to the experiences of girls in other countries and especially the experiences of the girls in Half the Sky. I'm certainly not equating my experience theirs. It's just that as a woman I'm struggling with living in a world that devalues me so much. While here in Guatemala I've been trying to wear bigger shirts and baggier pants just to avoid attention, but that shouldn't be the case. I shouldn't have to plan my outfits around being cat-called. I should feel free to be a woman in society.
I've talked about seeing the beauty and ignoring the ugliness, but today I saw it. I saw the ugliness. I can only think to appreciate this experience in the sense that I've delved deeper. Accepting and learning about a culture means to see all sides of it. I'm not saying that cat-calling is some overt part of Guatemalan culture. Most men on the streets don't cat-call me, it's just a select few. However, the existence of a select few thinking that this is okay is enough for me to call it a problem. Not everything in America is beautiful. Not everything in Guatemala is beautiful. I'm going to have experiences in life that shake me, break me and force me to build myself up again. Today was one of those days. I'm learning, growing and changing. It's a part of being human and it's a part of growing up. I'm 18 now. I guess it's as good a time as any to be an adult. The rest of the world thinks I am.
Sincerely,
Journey
There's one thing that I've been omitting from my posts, but today it's reached its peak. I'm done with catcalling and sexual objectification! Why does being a woman mean I have to deal with this disrespect? Since when does having boobs and a butt give a man a right to belittle me or treat me as if I'm nothing? I've talked about making cultural errors before, but is it a cultural error to be a woman? Some days that's what it feels like. Okay, ranting aside, you are probably very confused. I've never once mentioned the cat-calling, honking, staring or leering in any of my other posts. Maybe it was because it made me uncomfortable or it was something I wanted to ignore. Today showed me that I can't ignore it anymore. I want to be treated fairly. I want my body to stop being an object. I want to stop being an object. Maybe a small post on a Lovett Senior Project blog that no one really reads won't stop sexual harassment and sexual objectification around the world, but today it's enough for me, at least to get my feelings out and come back to normal.
First of all today was a bit irregular for me, because Kit, on account of having food poisoning from drinking Guatemalan tap water, didn't go to work or spanish lessons with me. For the first time I had to travel around Quetzaltenango alone. Maybe that was my first mistake, traveling alone. On average, Kit and I receive 3 cat-calls/whistles a day. Today I counted and I got 4 times as that. Maybe one girl is an easier target than two, I honestly don't know. It's not really something I seek to understand. The day started pretty normal. I got dressed, ate breakfast and packed my bag for the day. I checked on Kit and then left for the orphanage. I was nervous the whole walk to the orphanage, so much so that I practically ran there. Luckily, I was able to avoid attention (the real trouble started in the afternoon). I got a few stares, but that was something I was used to. Guatemala is not a very diverse country. People here are either of purely Mayan heritage or of a combination of Spanish and Mayan decent. Being black, I'm not exactly the average person here. It's a fact that I've become accustomed to.
I got to the orphanage at about 8:35 and immediately went upstairs to start helping with the babies. Today was a surprisingly easy day only made harder by the fact that I was sick. I'd gotten a cold from climbing the mountain on Saturday and was still recovering. The babies' room is always hot, but today it was scorching. I can't count how many time I said "hay calour" (It's hot in here) or "Yo tengo calour" (I am hot). So I spent the next few hours sweating as I changed diapers, comforted crying babies and rocked children to sleep. By the time 12:00 came around I was exhausted and totally not in the mood for anything, but my bed and a 20 hour nap.
The walk was relatively normal to begin with, but then there was a honk, followed by an obnoxious whistle. And that was just the first of many. There were kissy noises (apparently in Guatemala pursing your lips and making the kissing sound is a form of flirtation) followed by "hey baby". Some man even yelled at me from across the street just to get my attention. 1 or 2 cars slowed down (and one even stopped) next to me on the sidewalk to 'proposition' me. In truth they were more spaced out than this. I wasn't cat-called continuously for the entire 20 minute walk, but I might as well been. After the first few I was terrified. I felt dirty and lesser than. I wanted to shed my skin, crawl, and hide. I've never felt so personally violated by the actions of someone else. In these moments I would've given anything to be a man, because being a man in Guatemala guarantees you one thing: respect. Here my femininity and my body make me a target. It's makes me feel like less than nothing, almost non-existent. These people aren't seeing me. They see my 'assets' and then they sum me up based on that alone. I'm not human. I'm a walking set of boobs and a butt. No face. No personality. Nothing. Since when did being a woman mark me as a sexual object? Am I not good for anything, but sex?
These experiences most nearly remind me of my Global Non-violence class. Last semester when I was walking around getting signatures for my senior project form, I introduced myself to Mrs. Switzer (I'd never had her as a teacher before) and then told her that in lieu of my senior project I'd have to unfortunately drop her class in the coming semester. Before I left her room she implored me to think about non-violence while in Guatemala and in what ways the concepts we would learn could be applied or incorporated in Guatemala. To be honest, then I didn't think much of her suggestion. I wasn't coming to Guatemala to be a social activist and start a non-violent revolution. I didn't really understand how anything I would learn in non-violence could apply to my experience in Guatemala. Today, I do.
Before I left for Guatemala, we were talking about the existence and development of Rape Culture around the world. We even watched a video called Half the Sky which talked about the specific Rape culture in certain countries such as Cambodia, India, Sierra Leone and more. In these countries, gradually sexual violence, specifically against women, has been accepted into their society. In Cambodia there were girls as young as four years old being raped and sold into Brothels and in Sierra Leone there were girls 7 years old receiving FGM. It was horrible to watch and lead my class into a discussion about female violence not in these countries, but in our native country, America. We had some trouble identifying Rape Culture in America and that's when Mrs. Switzer informed us that because it's not nearly as overt in our own country, we may not be as prone to noticing it. That came to light for me while being here. It's not that I don't think cat-calling and sexual objectification doesn't exist in America, because it does. It's just that either I don't notice it as much or I'm not usually ina position to experience it (I'm very aware that there are places in Atlanta where a girl shouldn't walk alone). However, where I am in the world shouldn't matter. It should never happen period to any woman. What I've been experiencing is extremely mild compared to the experiences of girls in other countries and especially the experiences of the girls in Half the Sky. I'm certainly not equating my experience theirs. It's just that as a woman I'm struggling with living in a world that devalues me so much. While here in Guatemala I've been trying to wear bigger shirts and baggier pants just to avoid attention, but that shouldn't be the case. I shouldn't have to plan my outfits around being cat-called. I should feel free to be a woman in society.
I've talked about seeing the beauty and ignoring the ugliness, but today I saw it. I saw the ugliness. I can only think to appreciate this experience in the sense that I've delved deeper. Accepting and learning about a culture means to see all sides of it. I'm not saying that cat-calling is some overt part of Guatemalan culture. Most men on the streets don't cat-call me, it's just a select few. However, the existence of a select few thinking that this is okay is enough for me to call it a problem. Not everything in America is beautiful. Not everything in Guatemala is beautiful. I'm going to have experiences in life that shake me, break me and force me to build myself up again. Today was one of those days. I'm learning, growing and changing. It's a part of being human and it's a part of growing up. I'm 18 now. I guess it's as good a time as any to be an adult. The rest of the world thinks I am.
Sincerely,
Journey
Tuesday, April 19, 2016
Day 11: You're not from around here, are you?
Dear Reader,
While yesterday was full of hard work and determination, today was a day of relaxation. Kit and I went to Las Fuentes Georginas, a natural spa of sorts in Guatemala. We woke up at the pleasing hour of 8 a.m. and got dressed for the day before eating breakfast with the family. After breakfast we proceeded to the stop sign just a block beyond our host family's house to wait for the bus that would pick us up and take us to Las Fuentes Georginas. We waited for about 15 minutes until the bus arrived. The bus then picked up a few more people before heading for the hot spring.
The drive was an hour long on....you guessed it: twisty mountain roads. My favorite! I was lucky this time. I didn't get motion sickness. Luckily I've learned that if I listen to music and control my breathing then I can avoid getting motion sickness over a certain amount of time. Not having motion sickness gave me the chance to actually enjoy the view. As I talked about in an earlier post, agriculture is an important industry in Guatemala and many farmers live in the mountains where the soil is more plentiful. On the way to the hot springs we encountered more then our fair share of farmers and crops. Also considering it was Sunday, many people were picking their crops and packaging them to sell in the local markets. In passing I saw farmers picking and sorting all sorts of vegetables such as carrots, onions, cabbages and tomatoes.
I couldn't help, but once again see the irony in how we (all the people on the bus were tourists, the only Guatemalan was our bus driver) were driving up the mountain to enjoy a luxury, but these other people were coming to make their living. It was one of those moments when I thought about how I'd previously vacationed in other countries and either ignored or was completely sheltered from lives of ordinary citizens or in some cases the impoverished lives of ordinary citizens. For a moment I felt like an intruder, the American tourist who comes only to see the beauty and illusion and ignores the ugly reality. Not to say that being a farmer is an ugly reality; it's not, it's these people's livelihood. I'm not judging that, what I'm judging is myself and my own reluctance to actually explore culture I've been exposed to. I'm a little ashamed of the fact that I've never really taken the time to dig deeper and see beyond the tourist attractions and get to the core of the reality. This time I'm making a conscious effort to do just that, digging deeper, because I want to learn and understand. I didn't just come to Guatemala to just volunteer, but to learn Spanish, see the country and become active in a culture that is so rich and diversified from my own. And I guess for this reason in some ways after the excursion was over, I felt I enjoyed seeing the farmers and the livelihood of the people more than the actual hot springs.
The hot spring, however, was very nice, but it played out as more of a public pool than actual hot spring/spa (or so Kit told me considering I've never been to a spa). People came in droves to visit this place and enjoy the relaxing hot spring. I know I enjoyed it immensely considering most of my muscles were still sore after the mountain climb the day before. It was nice to soak and benefit from the pool's natural healing properties. There was only one thing that bothered me about being there: Kit and I stuck out like a sore thumb. No, it wasn't about race, although Kit and I are obviously not Guatemalan. It was about conservatism. Guatemala is a relatively conservative country in the sense all the women who attended the hot spring wore complete outfits to get in the water. I'm talking about wearing cargo shorts and cotton t-shirts and sporting them as swim wear. Considering the fact that Kit and I wore bikinis (well mine was a makeshift bikini from one of my bras and a pair of athletic shorts), we looked really promiscuous by Guatemalan standards which produced a lot of stares and unwanted attention from men and women alike. It was just another cultural error that I'd made and it served to give me a lot of attention that I didn't like. I felt like more of an outsider than I already was. It was an overwhelming sense that I just didn't belong and that bothered me immensely. After a 30 minute soak, Kit and I got out the pool, changed into some clean clothes and got some lunch. Before we knew it, it was time to leave Las Fuentes Georginas and return home.
Overall today was a good day and I most certainly learned more about what to do and what not to do in Guatemala. I guess there is a learning curve to understanding any culture and today I hit mine. My experiences might sound intense or over exaggerated, but that's how I felt in the moment. I still love this country and I'm glad that I came, it's just that I'm learning more and more that it's going to take a lot of patience and understanding on my part and that's something that I'm okay with.
Sincerely,
Journey White
While yesterday was full of hard work and determination, today was a day of relaxation. Kit and I went to Las Fuentes Georginas, a natural spa of sorts in Guatemala. We woke up at the pleasing hour of 8 a.m. and got dressed for the day before eating breakfast with the family. After breakfast we proceeded to the stop sign just a block beyond our host family's house to wait for the bus that would pick us up and take us to Las Fuentes Georginas. We waited for about 15 minutes until the bus arrived. The bus then picked up a few more people before heading for the hot spring.
The drive was an hour long on....you guessed it: twisty mountain roads. My favorite! I was lucky this time. I didn't get motion sickness. Luckily I've learned that if I listen to music and control my breathing then I can avoid getting motion sickness over a certain amount of time. Not having motion sickness gave me the chance to actually enjoy the view. As I talked about in an earlier post, agriculture is an important industry in Guatemala and many farmers live in the mountains where the soil is more plentiful. On the way to the hot springs we encountered more then our fair share of farmers and crops. Also considering it was Sunday, many people were picking their crops and packaging them to sell in the local markets. In passing I saw farmers picking and sorting all sorts of vegetables such as carrots, onions, cabbages and tomatoes.
I couldn't help, but once again see the irony in how we (all the people on the bus were tourists, the only Guatemalan was our bus driver) were driving up the mountain to enjoy a luxury, but these other people were coming to make their living. It was one of those moments when I thought about how I'd previously vacationed in other countries and either ignored or was completely sheltered from lives of ordinary citizens or in some cases the impoverished lives of ordinary citizens. For a moment I felt like an intruder, the American tourist who comes only to see the beauty and illusion and ignores the ugly reality. Not to say that being a farmer is an ugly reality; it's not, it's these people's livelihood. I'm not judging that, what I'm judging is myself and my own reluctance to actually explore culture I've been exposed to. I'm a little ashamed of the fact that I've never really taken the time to dig deeper and see beyond the tourist attractions and get to the core of the reality. This time I'm making a conscious effort to do just that, digging deeper, because I want to learn and understand. I didn't just come to Guatemala to just volunteer, but to learn Spanish, see the country and become active in a culture that is so rich and diversified from my own. And I guess for this reason in some ways after the excursion was over, I felt I enjoyed seeing the farmers and the livelihood of the people more than the actual hot springs.
The hot spring, however, was very nice, but it played out as more of a public pool than actual hot spring/spa (or so Kit told me considering I've never been to a spa). People came in droves to visit this place and enjoy the relaxing hot spring. I know I enjoyed it immensely considering most of my muscles were still sore after the mountain climb the day before. It was nice to soak and benefit from the pool's natural healing properties. There was only one thing that bothered me about being there: Kit and I stuck out like a sore thumb. No, it wasn't about race, although Kit and I are obviously not Guatemalan. It was about conservatism. Guatemala is a relatively conservative country in the sense all the women who attended the hot spring wore complete outfits to get in the water. I'm talking about wearing cargo shorts and cotton t-shirts and sporting them as swim wear. Considering the fact that Kit and I wore bikinis (well mine was a makeshift bikini from one of my bras and a pair of athletic shorts), we looked really promiscuous by Guatemalan standards which produced a lot of stares and unwanted attention from men and women alike. It was just another cultural error that I'd made and it served to give me a lot of attention that I didn't like. I felt like more of an outsider than I already was. It was an overwhelming sense that I just didn't belong and that bothered me immensely. After a 30 minute soak, Kit and I got out the pool, changed into some clean clothes and got some lunch. Before we knew it, it was time to leave Las Fuentes Georginas and return home.
Overall today was a good day and I most certainly learned more about what to do and what not to do in Guatemala. I guess there is a learning curve to understanding any culture and today I hit mine. My experiences might sound intense or over exaggerated, but that's how I felt in the moment. I still love this country and I'm glad that I came, it's just that I'm learning more and more that it's going to take a lot of patience and understanding on my part and that's something that I'm okay with.
Sincerely,
Journey White
Sunday, April 17, 2016
Day 10: We climb for fun. They climb for survival.
Dear Reader,
Today is Saturday, the day of relaxation and sleeping or at least that's what it is for me at home. However today my Saturday turned away from relaxation and imbedded itself in hard work and determination. Kit and I work up at 4:30am this morning to do none other than climb a mountain in order to see a volcano errupt. Pretty exciting stuff, right? Wrong. I don't think I've ever been so tired in my life. In total we ended up going 6.8 miles, which isn't bad for a hike up a mountain, but it is tiring for me. However, the most disappointing part of this experience was that we never saw the volcano explode, instead we heard it. Unfortunately, the clouds picked today to cover everything, ensuring that we didn't see anything. It was kind of sad. We'd come such a far way to see the volcano, but we never did. However, the view from the top of the mountain was astounding. It was such a peaceful place, full of natural beauty. I didn't want to leave the top of the mountain; it was just so beautiful.
Today I also had a minute of reflection. I'd never thought about the farmers and workers we would meet while climbing up the mountain. For the most part I considered it to be a touristy place, but I was proven very wrong. There carrying huge bags of vegetables and were men with horses, women carrying babies on their backs, and grandmothers wearing sandals. However, these kinds people were not climbing the mountain for fun, they climbed because that's where their crops were. A decent portion of Guatemala is rural and live the lives of farmers. Climbing this mountain was their everyday. This very idea was astounding to me. I could barely make it up the mountain once, but these people did this everyday. I admired them, inspired by their work ethic and strong wills.
No doubt that climbing the mountain was hard. In fact, I've never sweat so much in my life, but it was definitely worth it. Not even just to see the volcano, but because it was so fulfilling, both athletically and emotionally. Granted those were some of the four hardest hours I've had since getting here (even the babies couldn't compare).Yet, I wouldn't give up the hard work or the memories for anything. Today was a great day for me to look outside the box and see more of Guatemala in aggregate. I saw sides and shades of Guatemala that I'd never seen before. It made me glad that I could diversify my perspective and mind, because that's what this trip is for, right? Not only to have a complete cultural experience, but to redefine myself as a global citizen. Slowly, but surely I think that goal is coming to fruition.
Sincerely,
Journey White
Today is Saturday, the day of relaxation and sleeping or at least that's what it is for me at home. However today my Saturday turned away from relaxation and imbedded itself in hard work and determination. Kit and I work up at 4:30am this morning to do none other than climb a mountain in order to see a volcano errupt. Pretty exciting stuff, right? Wrong. I don't think I've ever been so tired in my life. In total we ended up going 6.8 miles, which isn't bad for a hike up a mountain, but it is tiring for me. However, the most disappointing part of this experience was that we never saw the volcano explode, instead we heard it. Unfortunately, the clouds picked today to cover everything, ensuring that we didn't see anything. It was kind of sad. We'd come such a far way to see the volcano, but we never did. However, the view from the top of the mountain was astounding. It was such a peaceful place, full of natural beauty. I didn't want to leave the top of the mountain; it was just so beautiful.
Today I also had a minute of reflection. I'd never thought about the farmers and workers we would meet while climbing up the mountain. For the most part I considered it to be a touristy place, but I was proven very wrong. There carrying huge bags of vegetables and were men with horses, women carrying babies on their backs, and grandmothers wearing sandals. However, these kinds people were not climbing the mountain for fun, they climbed because that's where their crops were. A decent portion of Guatemala is rural and live the lives of farmers. Climbing this mountain was their everyday. This very idea was astounding to me. I could barely make it up the mountain once, but these people did this everyday. I admired them, inspired by their work ethic and strong wills.
No doubt that climbing the mountain was hard. In fact, I've never sweat so much in my life, but it was definitely worth it. Not even just to see the volcano, but because it was so fulfilling, both athletically and emotionally. Granted those were some of the four hardest hours I've had since getting here (even the babies couldn't compare).Yet, I wouldn't give up the hard work or the memories for anything. Today was a great day for me to look outside the box and see more of Guatemala in aggregate. I saw sides and shades of Guatemala that I'd never seen before. It made me glad that I could diversify my perspective and mind, because that's what this trip is for, right? Not only to have a complete cultural experience, but to redefine myself as a global citizen. Slowly, but surely I think that goal is coming to fruition.
Sincerely,
Journey White
Day 9: Move and I'll scream
Dear Reader,
My introduction into the world of babies has been an uphill battle and it's a battle that I'm still fighting, but my experience has led me to come to 3 conclusions: Babies are temperamental. Babies are whiny. And finally, babies are irrational. Like honestly, if you are tired, why would you cry about it? Just go to sleep. If an adult tells you not to do something, it's probably for your own good and thus you shouldn't do it. That's just a few of the things I want to tell the kids at the shelter, but A) My spanish is not very good and B) they wouldn't listen or understand me anyway. As you can see, today was not a good day at the shelter. There was mass hysteria, crying, and poop explosions. Today, I was forced to change my first diarrhea diaper (an experience I never EVER want to have again), hold a baby that screamed bloody murder if you even remotely moved a muscle or changed into a position she didn't like and finally turn 4 crying babies into 4 happy sleeping babies. Mind you all of this happened just one hour into my four hour stint at the shelter. I think I was slowing slipping into insanity. Okay, that's a slight exaggeration.
I like the kids in spite of the frustrations that they bring. It's kind of hard to get into the mindset of these kids, as my world view and life experiences don't nearly compare to theirs; however, I often try to sympathize with their situations. I remember being 3 years old and following my mom out of daycare simply cause I didn't want her to leave me. These kids are the same way. 80% of the time when they are crying, it's because they want their mothers and though it is my job to placate them, there is only so much I can do. What they really need is their moms and what their moms really need is to get through school. Its a situation that a 2 or 3 year old can't possibly wrap their head around. In their world there is only one thing: their mom. Whenever mom is around life is great. Mom can make all the bad things go away. She can make them smile when they are sad. To them their moms are super heroes. In the real world, their moms are teenagers struggling to put things back together after tragedy. It's a perspective that some of them, unfortunately, are beginning to grasp. I want these kids to hold on to their innocence and playfulness, for them to live in the world of imagination where everything is perfect.And for the most part the orphanage does a good job of protecting these kids from that, from losing that innocence, yet slowly, but surely these kids are beginning to see the cracks. They're starting to see that the world isn't perfect. And once you realize that, once the illusion is over, it never comes back. That's the moment when you grow up and these kids are way too young to grow up. They haven't even lived yet and they're caught up in the adult world. It's really sad to me.
After volunteering, Kit and I walked home for lunch. On the way we stopped at McDonalds for some much needed Mcflurries. The first day we arrived in Xela and saw the McDonalds, Kit and I agreed that we would go there if we ever missed home or just needed the comfort that only home could bring. Today was just one of those days. When we got home we ate lunch and then I went to work on my spanish homework. I was to write two sentences for each of the new verbs that I'd learned the day before, one was supposed to be singular and the other plural. Once again I barely finished, having only 5 minutes to spare, but when Jaime saw my homework he only said that I'd done a good job. Fortunately my rushing was not evident in my homework. Today I learned about the prepositions por, para, de, con, and en, how to conjugate ER and IR verbs, as well as some new vocabulary words.
Also in the middle of our lesson, Jaime and I took a hike up to higher ground in order to get a view of Xela as a whole. There are two things I learned on my hike: 1) Xela has a dog problem and 2) Xela has a trash problem. First lets tackle the dog problem. When walking up the mountain road, there were so many stray dogs on the streets and in the brush. I'm a dog person and it just made me so upset to see how many abandoned dogs there were.When I asked Jaime he told me that many people in Guatemala buy a dog as a puppy and think they are very cute, but when the dog gets older they prefer not to have the dog anymore and abandon them on the street. Furthermore, people also often find themselves financially unable to provide for the dog and thus they have to let them go. Secondly, there is the trash problem. It's not as if people in Xela don't value the earth or the land, in fact, for many people it is the key to their survival; however, there is just a lack of places to put trash and thus it ends up rotting outside somewhere.
From above Xela looks huge, but that's to be expected of the second biggest city in Guatemala. Its an amazing place to live and be, despite its problems and issues. I hope with time so of these issues will die down and eventually disappear, but until then I'll continue to do what I can.
Sincerely,
Journey
My introduction into the world of babies has been an uphill battle and it's a battle that I'm still fighting, but my experience has led me to come to 3 conclusions: Babies are temperamental. Babies are whiny. And finally, babies are irrational. Like honestly, if you are tired, why would you cry about it? Just go to sleep. If an adult tells you not to do something, it's probably for your own good and thus you shouldn't do it. That's just a few of the things I want to tell the kids at the shelter, but A) My spanish is not very good and B) they wouldn't listen or understand me anyway. As you can see, today was not a good day at the shelter. There was mass hysteria, crying, and poop explosions. Today, I was forced to change my first diarrhea diaper (an experience I never EVER want to have again), hold a baby that screamed bloody murder if you even remotely moved a muscle or changed into a position she didn't like and finally turn 4 crying babies into 4 happy sleeping babies. Mind you all of this happened just one hour into my four hour stint at the shelter. I think I was slowing slipping into insanity. Okay, that's a slight exaggeration.
I like the kids in spite of the frustrations that they bring. It's kind of hard to get into the mindset of these kids, as my world view and life experiences don't nearly compare to theirs; however, I often try to sympathize with their situations. I remember being 3 years old and following my mom out of daycare simply cause I didn't want her to leave me. These kids are the same way. 80% of the time when they are crying, it's because they want their mothers and though it is my job to placate them, there is only so much I can do. What they really need is their moms and what their moms really need is to get through school. Its a situation that a 2 or 3 year old can't possibly wrap their head around. In their world there is only one thing: their mom. Whenever mom is around life is great. Mom can make all the bad things go away. She can make them smile when they are sad. To them their moms are super heroes. In the real world, their moms are teenagers struggling to put things back together after tragedy. It's a perspective that some of them, unfortunately, are beginning to grasp. I want these kids to hold on to their innocence and playfulness, for them to live in the world of imagination where everything is perfect.And for the most part the orphanage does a good job of protecting these kids from that, from losing that innocence, yet slowly, but surely these kids are beginning to see the cracks. They're starting to see that the world isn't perfect. And once you realize that, once the illusion is over, it never comes back. That's the moment when you grow up and these kids are way too young to grow up. They haven't even lived yet and they're caught up in the adult world. It's really sad to me.
After volunteering, Kit and I walked home for lunch. On the way we stopped at McDonalds for some much needed Mcflurries. The first day we arrived in Xela and saw the McDonalds, Kit and I agreed that we would go there if we ever missed home or just needed the comfort that only home could bring. Today was just one of those days. When we got home we ate lunch and then I went to work on my spanish homework. I was to write two sentences for each of the new verbs that I'd learned the day before, one was supposed to be singular and the other plural. Once again I barely finished, having only 5 minutes to spare, but when Jaime saw my homework he only said that I'd done a good job. Fortunately my rushing was not evident in my homework. Today I learned about the prepositions por, para, de, con, and en, how to conjugate ER and IR verbs, as well as some new vocabulary words.
Also in the middle of our lesson, Jaime and I took a hike up to higher ground in order to get a view of Xela as a whole. There are two things I learned on my hike: 1) Xela has a dog problem and 2) Xela has a trash problem. First lets tackle the dog problem. When walking up the mountain road, there were so many stray dogs on the streets and in the brush. I'm a dog person and it just made me so upset to see how many abandoned dogs there were.When I asked Jaime he told me that many people in Guatemala buy a dog as a puppy and think they are very cute, but when the dog gets older they prefer not to have the dog anymore and abandon them on the street. Furthermore, people also often find themselves financially unable to provide for the dog and thus they have to let them go. Secondly, there is the trash problem. It's not as if people in Xela don't value the earth or the land, in fact, for many people it is the key to their survival; however, there is just a lack of places to put trash and thus it ends up rotting outside somewhere.
From above Xela looks huge, but that's to be expected of the second biggest city in Guatemala. Its an amazing place to live and be, despite its problems and issues. I hope with time so of these issues will die down and eventually disappear, but until then I'll continue to do what I can.
Sincerely,
Journey
Day 8: Usted está adivinando (You're guessing)
Dear Reader,
I've never loved sleeping
children so much. It might actually fall into my top 10 favorite things in this
universe. Work was actually pretty easy today. I don't know if it was magic, a
miracle or what, but I'm so thankful to the gods of babies for making the
children sleep, because that's precisely what they did all day. There was
minimal crying and poopie diapers. It was pretty much perfect and it gave me
time to actually talk to Seely, the other volunteer working at the shelter, for
longer than thirty seconds in between tantrums and crying fits.
Seely is the
only other person, besides Kit and I, who is 18 at the shelter. She's currently
in the middle of her Gap Year and chose to spend a third of it in Guatemala,
volunteering at the shelter. Seely's already been at the shelter for a month
and has become involved in many projects to help the women at the shelter. For
instance, for every girl that leaves the shelter, Seely makes a care package
for them containing various items that they'll need for 'the real world'. Today
she enlisted Kit and I's help on another project for the shelter. Most of the
kids that I take care of at the shelter are currently suffering from a disease
(I don't know what it's called) that gives them diarrhea, farting, and stomach
pain. The nurses have been trying to combat it with medicine, but the shelter
doesn't have enough money for all the medicine they need. Seely calculated the
amount of money needed to buy the medicine necessary for the kids to get better
and began raising money, asking her spanish teacher and others such as Kit and
myself to donate to the cause. Kit and I are more than happy to help,
considering we were already planning to donate to the shelter anyway. In total
Seely needs 1800 quetzales which translates to about $278. So Kit and I have both
agreed to split up our money to donate to the shelter for medicine and other
needs.
Medicine is
just one small step in relation to all the material that the shelter needs.
They also need diapers, baby wipes, female sanitary products, clothes for the
mothers, toys for the kids and many other things. In short, the orphanage works
everyday without a lot of necessary supplies and staffing. It still amazes me
the strength of people's wills when faced with a challenge that seems very hard
or nearly impossible. By American standards, this shelter would've shut down
years ago, but they keep working because they know the girls at the shelter
need them. Being there makes me wish that there was more that I could do,
something more than just donating money or being a care-taker. In hindsight,
I'd like to think that my time spent with the kids was 'doing something' or
worth more than a little less stress for the nurses and the mothers during the
day. Somehow through this experience I'm giving the kids some kind of hope or
happiness about their situation and that the relief on the mother's parts is
enough to make them even more determined towards their studies. That's just one
small hope of mine, that my days at the shelter amount to more than just a little
baby-sitting, that I'm actually making a difference.
After work at
the shelter Kit and I went home for lunch and then I scrambled to finish my
Spanish homework. Jaime had given me 6 new verbs and I had to conjugate each of
them with all 7 pronouns, plus 3 of them had 4 different ways they could be
used and I had to do examples for each way. In other words, it was a lot of
homework, but I worked speedily and finished with 2 minutes to spare. Kit and I
then walked to the cafe and went to our respective Spanish teachers. Today I
learned vegetables, parts of the house, possession and how to conjugate AR
verbs, which in itself came with 14 brand new verbs to learn and memorize. Some
things came easy enough. French has been a big help and all, but others just
continue to slip my mind. After going through all the vegetables, Jaime
proceeded to test my memorization skills with a game. He'd say the name of a
vegetable in Spanish and I'd have to tell him in spanish the color and/or
colors that the certain vegetable came in. We started off relatively easy, el
brocoli is Broccoli and el zuchini is zucchini, but unfortunately not all
vegetables are that easy to figure out. I learned that the hard way.
When I stopped
knowing what vegetables he was talking about, I just guessed green. We were
talking about vegetables which I would deem 90% of them to be green. I was very
wrong and Jaime made sure to tell me so. He even did one of his famous google
translations in order to tell me. As I've said before, Jaime knows very little
English and I obviously don't know very much Spanish, thus the language barrier
is VERY real. Our lessons often rely on Jaime's brilliant charade skills and my
context clues skills/drawing skills. Luckily for me, many spanish words either
sound like french or english so it's relatively easy for me to guess or figure
out what he's trying to tell me. I also have pages of picture diagrams and
explanation attempts just in case context clues don't work. However,
somethings just don't translate well no matter how much Jaime waves his
hands or I listen for the hidden french or english behind the Spanish. Thus
google translate comes in. Today Jaime translated this phrase for
me: Usted está adivinando, which is Spanish for... You're guessing. This
very phrase,, which he's translated for me 3 times in the last few days, is the
reason why studying is so important.
You can
learn a lot in four hours and my spanish classes are expedited beyond belief.
In four days I've gone through about half of Spanish I. In other words, in 3
days I've learned (well sort of learned, memorizing all this stuff is hard)
what the average Lovett Spanish I student does in a full semester. Its a lot of
work and on occasion I still mix up my Spanish and my French creating the
beautifully mysterious language of Spench. That of course is always fun (note
the sarcasm). However I'm learning to take it day by day. I, of course, have to
study a lot and remember to actively use my Spanish whenever I can, but I think
with work (A LOT OF IT) I can make Spanish my third/second language
(considering I'm not actually fluent in French, I can just get by).
After Spanish class,
Kit and I went home. We ate dinner and then proceeded to get ready for bed...at
like 8:30. I feel like an old lady going to bed so early, but these days really
do take a lot out of you. I continue to take it all in piece by piece. I feel
as if I've learned so much in these last few days. Much more than the internet
and the research could've ever taught me. I feel incredibly lucky to have had
this experience. For me, this trip has been the gift that keeps on giving and I
can't wait to see what it has in store for me tomorrow.
Sincerely,
Journey
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